Why "frenemies" make the best types of parents for any child

October 13, 2015

Frenemies: we all have them. Whether at the work or within our own families, they are fairly common. So why would that make a good parenting duo?

Why

The answer is simple: competition. 

  • When most people hear the word, they think of someone who is pretending to be a friend when in fact they are actually an enemy, but a frenemy can also be a friend that you compete with or see as a rival.
  • Here's how it can benefit your child.

Competition

  • Competition is the basis on which capitalism was built.
  • If one party is slacking, or has made a mistake, the other party will jump ahead in the competition and the slacking party will be forced to keep up or go out of business; the competition benefits both parties.
  • The word "frenemies" comes into play in parenting because the competition must indeed be friendly, or the child will suffer as a result.

Get on the same page

  • Let's face it, there is no such thing as the perfect parent and it's a learning process that we must figure out on our own.
  • If there is no competition amongst parents, they may just coast through their kid's childhood, unknowingly making the same mistake over and over again.
  • However, if both parents are implementing different approaches to parenting, they will soon discover which approach the child best responds to and they can settle on it.
  • As long as both parties are able to communicate effectively and be open to admitting that they were wrong or that the other person is right, the competition will remain friendly.

Cheques and balances

  • Not only will the child benefit from the competitive relationship between the parents, but the strength of the husband-wife relationship will also benefit from this friendly competition.
  • By keeping each other in check, the parents will not only be communicating better than ever before, but they will also be working towards a common goal: raising a child in the best way possible.
  • Perhaps the "frenemies" line is a dangerous one to walk, but any strong relationship allows both parties to openly voice their opinions without the fear of the whole relationship falling apart.

As you can see, that competitive edge that you get from being frenemies with your spouse can help you to take your parenting skills to the next level, as well as strengthen your relationship. So give it a try, voice your opinion, do things your way, just remember that communication is key.

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